Jordan
& Lina.

"We met at a graduation for a ministry school. I felt drawn to you when I spent time with you after that. You started playing basketball with my brothers... one of the things that drew me to you was definitely how you cared for my brothers and how you asked deep questions about their faith."

"I had heard about you months before we met... I was evaluating you from a distance—not stalking, but looking at how you interacted with people. Seeing you be really caring towards others made me think, man, you are a high character person. And you're beautiful."

"Right now we are in the season of children approaching adulthood. We have one teenager and the rest are quickly entering that same age range. It is a full house."

"We have a full house. 6 children. 5 of them are less than 6 years apart, and then we had a surprise baby last year. Career-wise, I spent the first decade in vocational ministry and the second in technology and entrepreneurship."

"Moving from Houston to Idaho, there was a lot of difficulty connecting. A lot of arguing and hurtful things said. Big emotions. Putting the rings on the table was the rock bottom. We had to make the choice to be honest and identify where we were actually at."

"2022 and 2023. We moved to Houston and were in limbo. Those 9 months were extremely difficult. We moved every month. I felt like I was free falling. It got to a point where we took our wedding rings off and put them on the table. Seriously questioning staying together."

"I think contextually. Everything is connected. My understanding or reading into things can lead to miscommunication because I assume Jordan's words have more meaning behind them than they do. Jordan would literally tell me: 'You don't understand what I'm saying.'"

"I am more literal and analytical. A huge unlock for me was learning Myers-Briggs and realizing Lina is wired differently. I used to take offense at why she wasn't giving me what I was looking for in a conversation until I realized she literally thinks and feels differently."

"I used to be very avoidant. I thought conflict was bad and that peace meant keeping things shoved under the rug. Now, I view conflict as less threatening. Disagreeing is okay. It's not an end-of-the-world situation anymore."

"Early on, I was very direct and harsh out of ignorance. I wasn't aware of how my facial expressions or tone impacted Lina. Now, I have invited older men into my life to correct me. I've learned that my double constraint is pleasing God and pleasing my wife."

"I felt hurt because I haven't been able to play since the baby. Past-Lina would have been offended, withdrawn, and thought dark thoughts for a week. This time, I identified the feeling, brought it to Jordan, he listened and cared for me, and it was over in 15 minutes."

"When Lina brought up feeling left out about pickleball, past-Jordan would have focused on the 'objective reality'—did I do anything wrong? If not, her feelings were 'wrong.' Now, I recognize that her feelings are a huge part of what is objectively true. I gave attention to her heart first."

"It didn't surprise me that Jordan created a tool for feedback. It shows something deep in his heart—setting about to do something that didn't already exist to protect our direction."

"I needed a tool that ensures I am hearing and responding to what my wife and children are experiencing. It's hard to remember a conversation from two weeks ago when 5,000 other things happened. Keep makes the critical things 'sticky.' It is a fruit of my repentance."

"Find older, wiser, solid couples to be around. For those in the middle years, find fun ways to continue to invest. Things don't have to be broken to get better."

"For newlyweds: Get other people involved in your marriage. For those married 5-10 years: Don't be complacent. There is no ceiling to how healthy you can get. And sleep naked."